Avast: Pirate Chic Returns – And it Frightens Me

2Avast: Pirate Chic Returns – BlackBook.

There’s a right way to do pirate fashion, and there’s a wrong way. Wanna guess which one Vivienne Westwood chose? The wrong way – definitely the wrong way. But now that I think on it, most ways I’ve seen on the runways have been the wrong way. Jean Paul Gaultier back in 2007 had a mixed bag, and Gwen Stefani with her Rich Girl video struck several high points, but most of the stuff out there has been sorely misguided – and that goes double for mens’ wear. Why, oh why does no one design awesome modern clothing for the heterosexual, non-demented guy pirate? The answer, of course, is that straight, sane guy pirates pay no attention to fashion whatsoever, and buy most of their modern clothing at yard sales and side-show gift shops.

A few more highlights:


Comments (8)

  1. Tad


  2. Gunpowder Gertie

    So- you’re sayin’ we won’t be seein’ ya in your tighty whities wi’ an eyepatch, anytime soon , there, Bilge?

  3. Bilge (Post author)

    Eyepatch and tighty whities – never.

    Eyepatch and boxers – just a typical night in the hallway of the PyrateCon hotel.

  4. Nate

    Why? Can some one please tell me why-oh-why?

  5. Dave Nichols

    Fresh from the “Cabin Boy” Collection. YEECH!

  6. D.man

    Thats just plan wrong

  7. Doglock Hawk

    my god…. why? WHY?!


  8. Westwood's Bitch

    Most of these pieces are actually pretty genius. Just needing to paired with more simple attire to bring out the pirate effect better. Why does no one design awesome modern clothing for the heterosexual, non-demented guy pirate? Simple. He doesn’t exist. Think about it…what is ‘non-demented’ about wanting to dress like a pirate? Its at the very least…a little crazy. And that’s okay. Accept it an move on. If you don’t like Westwood’s stuff that’s okay too. Besides, few people have the disposable income to be able to afford her genius creations anyway. And even fewer people have the balls to wear it, or the bodies for that matter. Cheers!

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